Parachutes
by Brianna Jackson
Summary: AU; there was no bigger challenge then surviving your senior year.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

_"You call me your boy but i'm tryna be the man..."_

"You know it would be polite to share," I remind Peeta, eyeing the bundle of fries he has been devouring for the past five minutes. He picks his head up, raising an eyebrow before shaking his head no and returning to the previous task of eating as if he has no home training. "You'll make yourself sick." He shrugs, not even bothering to look up at me this time. I watch as she shovels handful after handful, not even bothering to swallow before another he shoves another wad of fried potatoes down his throat. I shake my head, turning my body to look out over the pier.

It's an unusually hot day in Santa Cruz, California for it being mid-August. The air is hot and dry, not enough wind to create a cool seventy degrees feel. Instead it's nearing ninety, the hot sun burning my pale skin. The clear blue water looks inviting. Children splash around in the waves, screaming when the cold water hits their little legs. Their parents sit on beach towels, scolding them for getting too close to the edge or reminding them to look out for jellyfish. The children are oblivious to their parents warnings though, engrossed in their own private escape from this hot day.

"Did you hear me?" My head snaps back towards Peeta who has managed to finish his pound of fries and is now downing the two liter coke he bought.

"No," I answer honestly, gathering the hair out of my face.

"I asked if you were ready to go."

"Oh. Yes, if you are." He gives me that small smirk that makes my heart flutter. He holds his hand out and I place mine in his, flinching at the grease that laces my hands as he winds his fingers around mine. He laughs at my expression, letting my hand go once I've managed to maneuver out of the picnic table we were seated at.

* * *

Peeta Mellark has been my best friend since seventh grade when he wrote me a poem, professing his deep and dying love for me, and read it in front of Mrs. Millers seventh grade English class. Once he was done, I had promptly removed myself from my desk, walked to the front of the classroom and punched him in the face, breaking his nose, which resulted in my first suspension.

Once I returned from my two days at home, I found Peeta playing soccer with a few of his friends on the field that day. He flinched when I walked up, shielding his bandaged nose from my view. Back then, I stood a whole foot above him which had come to my advantage on having the upper hand in almost everything. I shoved him with one hand. "We can be friends," I told him, watching his body sink as I said so, becoming relaxed once he realized I wasn't there for revenge.

He swiped the sweaty blonde hair from his face, standing up on his tippy-toes so that we stood about roughly the same height. "Okay," he said, giving me a small smile. I glared at him, giving him one more push which knocked him to the ground being he was unbalanced. I stared at him on the floor, mad that he was still smiling.

That day he sat with Madge and me at lunch.

And then every day after that.

* * *

No matter how many times I had been to Mellark estate, the size still amazed me. Peeta buzzed in the gate, waving at the gate-keeper, Thom, as we passed. "How are you today, Ms. Everdeen?" He calls after us, smiling threw the glass window.

"Thom, please call me Katniss. Ms. Everdeen is my mother," I remind him for the millionth time, sharing a friendly smile with him.

"Sorry Ms. - Katniss. It's a force of habit," he smiles back; waving goodbye to us as Peetas jeep disappears through the gates and up the winding driveway.

Peeta fiddles with the radio, drumming his thumbs on the wheel when he finally finds a song that suits his taste. "I can sing, you know." I tell him, sending him a small smile. He turns his head towards me, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah?" He questions, bumping his shoulder with mine. I nod my head, turning my attention back towards the driveway. "Sing for me, Ms. Everdeen," he says, mocking the slight accent Thom has.

"I'm afraid I can't do that," I say, acting like I'm locking my lips.

"And why not?"

I give a small, humorless laugh. "I haven't sung since my dad died," I answer. I watch out of the corner of my eye as Peetas body stiffens. His hands grip the steering wheel a little bit tighter, his knuckles white.

My dad died my freshman year in a plane crash. He had gone on a business trip to Washington, D.C. and was returning home three days early to try and make it too my first soccer game. He and forty other passengers died on impact. There was no body to bury.

My mother had taken it the hardest, shutting down and leaving me too care for my younger sister, Prim. If it hadn't been for the Mellarks, I doubt we would have been able to keep the house. Mr. Mellark secretly paid the rent on our small town house for five months until my mother had finally gotten back on her feet. Mrs. Mellark—who took little liking to Prim and I—even let Prim have her birthday party that year on the estate.

"I didn't mean to pry," Peeta says, eyeing my cautiously.

"Don't worry about it," I tell him, unbuckling myself. Peeta followed my lead and jogged around the car too open the car door for me. "You don't have to do that."

"What?" Peeta asks, looking honestly confused.

"Open my door. I can do it myself," I scold.

"Its called being a gentleman. Gale should try it," he shots back. I send daggers his way at the sound of Gales name.

Gale and I had been dating for little over a year, much to Peetas dislike. Gale was two years older than Peeta and I, already a sophomore in college. He attended Pepperdine in Malibu but returned home most weekends and holidays.

"What is he doing with a senior anyway? Aren't there any pretty girls in Malibu," Peeta always asks, scowling when I blow off plans with him to spend time with Gale.

"None as pretty as me. Now stop your complaining," I'll say, usually sending a friendly slap his way.

"Don't be mad, Katniss," Peeta says, a hand reaching for my arm. I shrug away from his touch and just in time, my iPhone rings.

_Gale calling. _

Peeta groans, sitting on the porch of his home, placing his head in his hands. "Hello," I whisper in to the phone, sounding less than enthusiastic.

"Well hello to you too sunshine," Gale laughs in to the phone. I smile.

"Sorry, it's just- nothing. How are you," I ask.

"Good. Called to say I'll be down for Labor Day weekend." I count in my head. That's next week. Lord how time flies.

"Cool. Looks like you can attend the Mellark Brunch with me," I say, smiling at Peeta who looks like he's just been shot.

"NO YOU CAN'T!" Peeta yells, loud enough for Gale too hear.

"Doesn't sound like Baker Boy wants me there. How is Peet doing?" He laughs, sounding unphased.

"Oh, you know. Peeta's Peeta." Gale laughs.

"Hey, I have to go. Have a good day. Call me later?" I can hear his smile over the phone.

"Of course," I tell him.

"I love you." And with that I hang up the phone.

As soon as I turn around, I see Peeta is doubled over in laughter, unable to control the sobs that shake him. My face contorts in confusion, not even sure if I should ask what is so funny. "You… You… You still can't-", with that he falls back down, unable to catch his breathe.

"What the hell are you talking about," I ask, the annoyance from earlier coming back.

"Ah, just break up with the kid already," he laughs.

"And why would I do that?" I cross my arms in front of my chest.

"You still can't say it back," he tells me, giggling.

"What?"

"You still can't say it. I love you. You can't say it back. You two have been dating for a year and you can't say I love you back."

He's right. Gale loves me. I know that. Peeta knows that. This whole town knows that. But for some reason, I still can't say it back.

No matter how much truth lays in Peetas words, it doesn't stop me from sending a right hook across his face. My fist makes a satisfying crunch when it connects with his jaw, leaving him speechless for a moment.

"The fuck," he yells at the top of his lungs.

"I love you should be special. Not like you who just uses it to get in girls pants. Gale loves me and he'll wait until I'm ready to say it," I tell him, turning around and beginning to walk down the gravel road, ready to go home.

"Well I know he really loves you. He's not getting in your pants either," Peeta jokes, falling in to step with me. I swing again but he is prepared for it this time, catching my fist in midair. He isn't fast enough for my knee though.

He sinks to the ground, mumbling cuss words on the way down. "Damn you, Katniss," is the only sentence I can make out. I wait until he has resurfaced with a strained look on his face. His blue eyes are annoyed but not angry. A look I get quite often from Peeta Mellark. "Do you wanna go home?" He asks, his teeth still clenched.

"Please."

The car ride home is silent except for the few rude remarks Peeta manages to mumble every now and again.

Peeta and I fight. In fact, we fight alot. We almost never agree on anything except how fake Glimmer Jennings boobs are or who should be voted off of American Idol every week. But we never stay mad.

Most people don't understand how we can be friends being so different. Him being so outgoing. Me being so shy. Him being so nice. Me being so defenseive. "We learn to balance each other out," we tell people who ask. Because we do.

Once were safely on the other side of town, in front of my small home, I eject myself from the car. "And Peeta," I call out once I'm at the front door.

"Hm?"

"I love _you. _You know that?" His eyes soften, no longer annoyed with my antics.

"Yeah. I guess you're alright too."

And then he's gone.

* * *

**I NEED HELP WITH SPARKS! i dont plan on abandoning it but i'm having trouble. Please message me if you have any thoughts? AND PLEASE REVIEW THIS STORY!**

**This was very fun to write! **

**Thanks!**


	2. Chapter 2

_"Am I a fool to believe in you,  
Cause I dont know..."_

Chapter 2

"And Peeta, how did you spend your day?" Family dinner is underway, already complete with my mother heckling my brothers about how muffled their hair looks and the wrinkles in the matching black polos they have on. My father is sitting quietly in his seat at the head of the table, his nose in the newspaper.

My eye wander away from the baked potato our cook, Sae, has put in front of me and land on my mother who looks at me as if I'm an animal. Her dark hair is down, falling in a curtain around her face kind of like Katnisses tends to do. I give a small smile at the thought of ever comparing my mother to Katniss. "Um," I mumble, taking a sip of my water to buy myself a little time.

My brothers had spent their day at the Boardwalk my family owns on the beach. They claim they had volunteered to take extra hours but I know it had to be my mothers' idea. Liam and Rhy almost never volunteer to work at the Boardwalk.

"He was with Katniss. What else?" Liam says in between taking a bite of his baked chicken. His mouth is still full when he says so, small pieces of food spraying out over the table. "I saw them go to the Boardwalk this morning."

Dammit.

I never knew what problem my mother really had with Katniss; I just knew it was a big enough problem to physically flinch every time her name was brought up in to conversation. I tried my best to avoid it but one of my dumbass brothers always had to bring her in to the conversation. I silently curse them now.

"You went to the Boardwalk and did not offer any help," My mother asks, her voice strained. I know I'm about to get a lecture on "how I am older now and need to do my part", but I know that the frustration in her voice is not that I did not help, it was that Katniss was there with me.

I don't know why my mother dislikes Katniss so much. Katniss is nothing but polite when she comes over and makes a conscious effort to talk to my mother about things that interest her but even then, my mother never says any more than two words to her and yells at my father later that night about "the trash I accompany myself with". I've asked my father who says I wouldn't understand and wouldn't help me understand. Katniss says it's something that happened in high school. That she doesn't know what but her mother has the same reservations about my parents as mine do about hers. But we don't let it bother us. We don't care.

"Is Katniss attending the brunch next weekend," my mother asks, chewing on one lone green bean.

"Yes. I invited her," I tell her, focusing my attention back to my food which I suddenly don't have an appetite for. I hear my mother forks drop on to her plate and give a dramatic feel to the conversation which has just turned south. My father looks up from his newspaper and eyes my mother carefully, giving her silent plead not to make a big deal out of it. But my mother, in her typical fashion simply cannot have it.

The annual Mellark Brunch my mother hosts on the estate is one of the most anticipated charity events in Santa Cruz. It's always during Labor Day weekend and everyone wears their Sunday best while sipping champagne and eating small pastries. Only the elite are invited but it still ends up being around three hundred who attend after the one hundred fifty guests each bring a date. Mine—every year—has been Katniss.

"You should take Delly Cartwright," my mother tells me. "She's a nice girl."

"Well if you invited Katniss, I wouldn't have to bring her as my "date"." Rhy looks up from his plate of food and Liam chokes on the water he has been drinking. I even feel my father sink the tip of his boot in to my shin.

"I will never invite _that girl_ too one of my events and it kills me that you feel it necessary to bring her to every single of them. She is trash, Peeta. Trash whom you should not be surrounding yourself with. Take my advice when I tell you that girl will bring you-"

"Her name is Katniss," I interrupt.

"You think I don't know that," she questions, sounding thoroughly offended.

"Well you keep calling her "that girl" so obviously you must not." Rhy snorts beside me, Liam covering his mouth, amazed by my defiance. If there is one thing we don't so in the Mellark household, it is defy my mother in any way.

My mothers' blue eyes grow bigger, her left hand gripping the butter knife tightly. She points one long fingernail in my direction, pointing towards the door, "You can excuse yourself." I don't have to be told twice.

I bound up from my seat, grabbing my car keys in the process. I fish my phone out of my pocket, dialing the only number I know by heart. Katniss answers on the first ring.

"Hello?" The sound of her voice instantly calms me, makes the anger that's boiling up die down.

"Hey," I say, getting in to my jeep which Liam and Rhy seemed to have purposely blocked in. I mentally curse them to hell before maneuvering my way out of the driveway. "Are you busy?" I ask. It's only been about five hours since I've seen her but suddenly five hours seems like way to long ago.

"No. I'm just here with Prim. Mom has to work the night shift tonight."

"Can I come over?" I ask, sounding a little more desperate than I probably should.

"Of course. The doors unlocked." Then the line goes dead.

The drive to Katnisses home isn't a long one, only about ten minutes. She leaves on the east side of town which we call the Seam. Ms. Everdeen doesn't have enough money to afford a house on the beach or an estate like mine but the small home she does have is perfect for the three of them.

I don't bother knocking being the door is already open. Prim is sitting on the couch, watching a show on television when I barge in. She seems unphased when I slam in the door. "I could be a killer," I tell her, ruffling her blonde hair as I make my way to sit next to her.

"But yet, you're not," she says sarcastically, popping her pink bubble gum in my face. I laugh. "What are you even doing here? You were just with Katniss," she mumbles, not bothering to look up at me as she speaks.

"Eh, family dinner didn't go so well," I tell her. She shoots me a sympathetic smile, patting my knee.

"Peeta, come upstairs!" I hear Katniss yell from the top of the stairs. I bid farewell to Prim and climb the steps, meeting her at the top. Katniss doesn't bother with greeting when I see her but just escorts me in to her small bedroom at the top of the stairs.

The room is clean except for a few dresses which are scattered around her room. "What are you doing?" I ask, picking up a long blue dress that lies over the bed. I lay down, putting my hands behind my head. She looks back at me, knocking her hips against my shoes.

"I'm trying to figure out what to wear to this stupid brunch," she tells me, squinting at a red dress which looks uncomfortable. "What about this one?" She asks, placing a floral dress around her shoulders.

"It's pretty," I tell her, not entirely sure what to say. She smirks at me, lying down next to me. I lace my fingers threw hers, something I do often. I feel her fingers tighten around mine, her pointer finger drawing five circles on the back of my hand like she always does.

I always wondered if Katniss and I were meant to end up together. Maybe we were. We had balance I couldn't say for anyone else, a friendship like no other. She was the first thought I had in the morning, the last thought I had at night. She was the girl I saw in my dreams and then when I woke up. Katniss was the one I saw a life with. A happy life, that is.

Maybe I was naïve and didn't know what I was talking about. She was my best friend. Best friends don't fall for each other.

"What's eating you?" I hear her ask. I turn my head toward her, exhaling.

"Family dinners suck," I inform her, shaking my head when the memory of my mothers mean words return. Her face suddenly turns pale and I feel the hand I'm holding go limp.

"Peeta, I- I don't know about the brunch. I doubt your mother wants me there," she tells me.

"When have you ever cared about what she wants?" I counter play.

"I just don't think it's a good idea."

"Is it Gale?" I ask, the jealousy getting the best of me.

Her grey eyes narrow and she rolls away slowly, refusing to look at me. She always hates when I bring up Gale, almost as much as I hate Gale. "Of course not, Peeta," she says sharply, rolling her eyes. It's my turn to smirk. "You always have to bring him up, huh?"

I shrug. "I don't have too. I choose too." I feel her fist sink in to my side for the third time today.

"What's your problem with him?"

What _is _my problem with him? That's a good question. I don't have a good answer. He goes to school at least three hours away, so it isn't like Katniss neglects me for him. Even when he is here on weekends, all three of us seem to hang out together. We're always cordial to each other, at least in front of Katniss. I'm sure he goes to Katniss after I'm gone, as I do when he's gone.

But why I hate him so much?

I don't know. I think it's in the handbook that you just have to hate your best friends' boyfriend.

"Don't know," I tell her. She doesn't ask me again. "I'm don't wanna go home," I admit.

"Why not," she asks, her dark eyebrows knitting together.

"Just my mother." I don't need to say anything more because she understands perfectly. Just then, my phone buzzes, my father's name popping up on the screen. I groan, rolling my eyes in distaste before hitting the accept button and holding the phone to my ear.

"Hello?" I say into the phone.

"I'm assuming you're at the Everdeen home," he tells me.

"Yes."

"We need you to come home. You have a guest." A guest?

"Who is it?"

"You'll see when you get here. Just come home." Then the line goes dead.

"I gotta-" I start.

"I know," Katniss interrupts, winking at me as I get to my feet, fishing the car keys out of my pocket.

"See you tomorrow," I let her know.

"I'm actually going to Annies tomorrow," she tells me.

Annie Cresta is one of her best friends, girlfriend to my best friend Finnick Odiar.

"Eh, I'll probably still see you." She smiles at me, lifting her hand to wave goodbye. She grabs my hand before I can make it out the door, her grey eyes searching my blue ones for something. "If she hits you, come here."

I flinch. My mother has only hit me a number of times, but each was enough to raise strong concern and send too school the next day with bruises. Enough to make Katniss worried every time we fought.

"You know I will," I assure her.

"Call me later?"

"Of course." I close the door as I leave, saying goodbye to Prim before getting into my jeep and making the journey home once more.

Thom is not at the front gate when I arrive which has been left open. Something unusual.

The door is also open when I push, revealing a smiling blonde sitting on my couch, my parents on each side of her showing her baby pictures. "Oh, Peeta you're back," my mother smiles, the attitude she puts on for guests on.

"Hi Peeta," Glimmer says, sending me a large smile, moving her blonde hair from the shoulder.

Oh lord.

* * *

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	3. Chapter 3

**AN: I have gotten so many notifications regarding this story and am so appreciative of all the positive response! School just started for me but I will try to update as soon as possible. Here is Chapter 3! Please review. **

"_**They stare at me while I stare at you."**_

Chapter 3

"So did you hear?" I look over at Annie, watching as she brings a coke bottle filled with some kind of liquor to her lips and takes a long, satisfying drink.

"Hear what?" I ask, sipping on the water Annie had gotten for me when I first arrived at the manor.

Annie's family owned the flower shop in town. They weren't as wealthy as Peetas family was, but they had more money than I could ever imagine having. The private beach that was connected to the estate was a hot spot on weekends and most parties for our senior class were either held here. Almost every weekend, the beach was lined with hundreds of drunken high-schoolers, nothing in mind but hooking-up and drinking themselves in to oblivion. Annie didn't mind though. Neither did her parents. They never paid much mind to her and as long as she was making good grades, they had little say about her smoking and drinking habits she picked up along the way.

Today, we're tanning on towels out in the hot sand, attempting to make our skin a shade darker for the Mellark brunch.

"Peeta's taking Glimmer Jennings to the brunch on Sunday," I snap the black ray bans off of my face, eyeing Annie suspiciously. It's a rumor, I convince myself. Peeta would never take her. He is the one always saying what a bitch she is.

"That can't be true," I tell Annie who has a gentle smirk on her face. She runs a hand threw her red hair, the light reflecting off of it.

"Well believe it. Finnick told me." Finnick is Annies long time boyfriends, a senior like us at Trinity. Finnick is a swimmer, one of the best in the country and even has a full ride to Pepperdine in the fall. He and Annie will be attending together. Aside from the amazing athlete Finnick is, he's also one of Peetas best friends. "Don't look so heartbroken, Katniss."

Heartbroken? No. Certainly not.

"What," I ask, trying my best to look offended by the accusation.

"It's written all over that pretty little face of yours. If you want to go with Peeta, then tell him that. And I don't mean that friend shit you two have been doing for the past five years," she tells me.

"I have no idea what you mean." At this she laughs and once again raises the glass to her lips. Her phone buzzes next to her, probably a message from Finnick who is supposed to be stopping by while her parents are at work.

"You better perk up because the boys are here!" She sings, throwing a towel around her body before going to answer the door.

Boys? I thought it would just be Finnick.

It clicks then. She got me.

Before I even have time to properly cover up my exposed body, Peeta and Finnick are wrestling threw the door way, loudly joking about something that happened on the way here. They both stop talking when they see me, Peeta turning a bright red. They eye me, stopping once they get to the bright blue bikini I'm in.

"If I wasn't so in love with Annie, you'd be my first choice, Everdeen," Finnick jokes, winking at me as he passes.

"You're funny," I let him know. He winks once more in response, removing his own shirt and running in to the waves, yelling for Annie to join him. She does and the next thing I know, Peeta and I are alone. This normally wouldn't have been a problem but the fact that I had just been told he was taking Glimmer Jennings to his mother's brunch wasn't eating at my insides.

There had never been anything romantic between Peeta and I but the feeling I was getting in the pit of my stomach felt a little like jealousy. I try to convince myself I don't care, that it's none of my business. And it isn't my business but I do care. I have no right to be mad at him. After all, I was bringing Gale. Maybe he just thought he would need someone too. But why _her. _

I had been going to school with Glimmer Jennings since kindergarten. Back then, I had actually been able to stand the girl. As we got older, her boobs got bigger as did her attitude. There had been an ongoing feud between the two of us since seventh grade when she hung my bra from a light pole outside of school. That was the day I broke my hand from punching her in the jaw repeatedly. Thus leading to my second suspension.

"Earth to Katniss," Peeta says, waving a hand over my face, eyeing me suspiciously. I blink once, the anger at him bubbling in my chest, threatening to spill out. "You okay? You seem a little tense."

"Fine," I say shortly, unable to form any other coherent words.

"Excited for the brunch?" He sits down next to me, taking Annies spot.

"Yeah," I say after a moment of silence. "Gale is too," I add, just to aggravate him a little. The muscles in Peetas jaw lock and one hand clenches a handful of sand. He lets it slip between his big fingers, making a small castle with it. He relaxes then, exhaling. "Is Glimmer?"

Peetas snaps his head around, his eyes rounder than I have ever seen. I've caught him. "Who told you," he asks, his voice strained and worried.

"I thought we weren't keeping secrets," I whisper so quietly I'm not one hundred percent sure he hears the words.

"I wasn't _not _going to tell you. I just didn't know _when_ to tell you."

"Whatever, Peeta," I say back, reaching around him to grab Annies bottle. I take a long sip and choke as it sinks down. Peeta eyes me suspiciously, making it a point to show me how disgusted he is with me drinking. Right now, I couldn't give two fucks about what I do to upset him.

He upset me when he decided he wanted to bring Glimmer Jennings.

"Why are you so mad anyway? Did you expect me to hang out with you and Gale all day?" His eyebrows knit together, his blue eyes filled with silent fury.

"I expected you to pick absolutely _any _other girl besides Glimmer Jennings," I tell him, covering his face with my breath which smelled of strictly alcohol. His face scrunches up in return.

"I didn't have much of a choice, Katniss. She came to the house and my mother practically forced me too." I soften a little bit at the words, knowing it was not entirely his decision to take her. But he still didn't tell me and we never keep secrets.

"Then why didn't you tell?" Just then, a wet Finnick returns from the water, lying down beside me. The sand sticks to his wet skin and gives off an unattractive look. Annie follows him shortly, tugging on his hand.

"You don't mind if we leave you for a while, no?" She gives me the look. The look that tells me I better not mind.

"No, I was actually just leaving," I tell her, packing up my things and dusting off my back.

"You just got here though," she informs her, her bottom lip sticking out just a smidge.

"I know. But Prim has dance so I have to take her," I lie. Peeta rolls his eyes.

"Oh. Okay, we'll have fun. Call me later, doll." She kisses both of my cheeks before flouncing off with Finnick who makes a joke about the "sexual tension on the beach". I shake it off, not even bothering to respond but instead walking away from Peeta who has followed me too my feet.

I walk swiftly inside the house, looking on the kitchen counter for my car keys. I begin to frantically search when Peeta appears, jingling the keys in front of my face. "Missing these?" He teases, holding them high above my head, a game we often play. He seems to have forgotten that I'm angry with him.

"Give them to me, Peeta." I scold, reaching for them. He only holds them higher.

"You've been drinking. I'd be a terrible best friend if I let you drive in that condition," he tells me, smirking.

"Too bad I'm not drunk," I whisper harshly, giving him one more chance to surrender the keys before I relive my first suspension. "Give them to me." He gives in, putting them in my hand with a defeated look on his face. I rush past him, not in the mood to fight with him. I hear his heavy footsteps as he follows, calling my name.

"BYE PEETA!" I call back, shooting him the bird as I get into my small Honda, starting the engine.

He groans loudly and then disappears in to the house.

* * *

Peeta and I are twelve when my father dies.

This was when we were still strangers. I only knew him as Peeta Mellark; the boy whose parents owned the boardwalk.

He hung out with all the merchant kids. All the preppy ones who wore collared shirts and dresses to school day after day. None of them talked to me but I would sometimes catch a small blue-eyed blonde haired boy watching me from the playground. I wouldn't think anything of it at the time. Maybe I had a stick in my hair or forgot to scrub some of the dirt off of my face.

My father died when I was in the sixth grade, right when the air was starting to chill. I didn't go to school for weeks. I couldn't get out of bed in the morning. I would walk Prim to the lower school building and go home; sometimes I'd escape to the mountains if weather permitted. My mother had no idea I would sneak away until the school sent a letter home with Prim, asking where I was and if I was okay.

My mother was so lost she didn't even bother scolding me about it.

When I did return though, all the merchant kids talked to me, smiled at me and shared their fruit with me. Glimmer Jennings even brushed my hair for me before re-braiding it.

Everyone was sweet to me except the blonde boy who watched from a far.

After math that day, I went to an empty hallway and cried for what felt like hours until I heard footsteps approach me. "Here," the voice said. A hand held a cupcake, my name written in green icing across the top. I look up and find a pair of blue eyes staring at me.

"What…"

"Oh, I almost forgot." He pulls out another cupcake from a small tin, the words "sorry" written this time.

"Thank you," I whisper.

"Don't mention it, Katniss." Then the boy leaves.

* * *

I get home with seven text from Peeta.

_I'm sorry._

_It was kind of rude of you to leave though._

_So now you won't reply?_

_Katnissss… Katniss…_

_C'mon._

_I had to. You don't get it._

_Katniss…_

I read them all, not bothering to respond.

I'm angry. You don't reply when you are angry.

My phone buzzes once more, my iPhone going off on the counter where I left it.

_You know I love YOU right?_

I don't know why but my heart flutters. We say this often but hearing it now makes some of the anger melt away.

**Yeah, you're not so bad either.**

I smile down at the message before closing my phone, going to find Prim.

* * *

Was it okay? I hope it wasn't too bad! I had a little trouble writing this one! The Famous Mellark Brunch is next chapter.

Wonder what trouble will stir up there? REVIEW.

Thanks.


	4. Chapter 4

"_**Super rich kids with nothing but lose ends,  
Super rich kids with nothing but fake friends."- Frank Ocean**_

Chapter 4

I was awoken out of the crack of dawn by Sae who rushed in to my room, mumbling something about what a devil my mother was too work with. "You get up now and help me boy. NOW!" She poked my side with the old rolling pin, not leaving until I had successfully untangled myself from my covers and made an attempt to wake myself up. I watched her as she crossed the room quickly, her hips moving in sync with every step she took. "Get dressed, boy!"

I always appreciated how Sae never felt the need to call me Mr. Mellark or Mr. Peeta. I hated when the help my mother kept around the house did. They had been helping my parents since Liam was first born and were considered family for the most part. I hated when they treated me as if they really were the help. If my mother heard any of them address me without "mr" though, she would throw a fit, making them correct it immediately. Except Sae, of course. Even my mother knew to leave Sae to her own devices.

I find an old t-shirt from my middle school days and throw it on, not bothering to look in the mirror before leaving the room. After all, it was too early to worry about what anyone thought of my appearance. There was plenty of time for that later in the day when all of judgmental "friends" arrived in their Chanel dress and Louis Vuitton tailored suits. I shuddered at the thought, not really prepared for the day ahead.

I could hear the clinking of my mother's heels from the top of the stairs, her shrill voice screaming in to the phone receiver as she made a point to tell whoever she was talking too they were to get here as soon as possible. I'm assuming it is the flowers being it takes around five hours to arrange those to my mother's expectations.

I arrive in the kitchen to see the whole house has been awakened. Liam has his head down on my grandmother's old kitchen table, a small amount of drool pooling from him mouth. Rhy is fiddling with his phone, probably trying to wake up his girlfriend, Clove, who I'm sure will be here a whole hour early so they can sneak off to his room and do god knows what. My father is sipping his coffee, his eyes trained on yesterday's newspaper being its way too early for a new one to be delivered to the estate. I take my usually seat at the table, putting my head in my hands, closing my eyes.

"No sleeping," my mother hisses, hitting the back of my head with a heavy hand. I open my eyes, shooting a look towards my father who is watching the scene carefully. "I need everyone's help today." She wakes Liam, mumbling something to him about how he should go get presentable. He shrugs, excusing himself before exiting the room without another word.

"I thought you hired someone to help you," Rhy mumbles, throwing his phone across the room.

"I did but that doesn't matter. You do what I ask," she scolds. No one says anything else because the blue vein in her forehead is beginning to become prominent and aggravating her today is something none of us care to do. "Now go out to the gates and begin helping bring things in." With that, she scurries out of the room, the phone attached to her ear.

"Well you heard her boys," my father says, sliding from the table and throwing on the slippers that have been laid out for him. Rhy and I follow his lead, screaming down for Liam to join us who we all know has fallen back asleep in the comfort of his twin bed.

The air outside is nice, crisp. Fall is coming in quickly and with it, wind and a nice amount of shade is falling over Santa Cruz. Although I am still in no mood for the brunch, having it be in seventy degree weather does lighten up my mood a small amount.

When we arrive at the gates, Thom is busy checking in the four large trucks that are parked behind the gate. He looks down at the check board he must have gotten early this morning from my mother, looking confused. "Thank god you all are here!" He sings, greeting all of us as we let the trucks in, helping the workers carry the vases of flowers and poles for the tents up to the grounds.

What feels like hours later, the tents, bar and tables are set up over the grounds, making it look the same it does every year. The autumn colored flowers have been spread around, making it looks…nice. My mother seems pleased, thanking all of us. She even goes a step further and kisses me softly on the cheek, thanking me for my work. I tell her it was no problem but the grey t-shirt which is now black from sweat probably tells her otherwise. "Now go change," she says sharply, touching the rollers that are in her blonde hair.

I roll my eyes but take my shirt off at the first chance I get, sighing at how great the air feels across my hot skin. The house is just as crazy as the yard is and I can hear Sae yelling at the kitchen staff to put the finishing touches on the beginning meals for the brunch. "Peeta!" She calls before I can make it up the stairs. I poke my head in the kitchen and find her standing over a large bowl of what looks like gourmet eggs. "Here try," she shoves a fork full of the eggs in my mouth which makes me groan in pleasure.

"So good," I mumble, going in for another forkful of the food. She stops me before I have the chance, turning me around and pushing me out of the kitchen.

"I would ask you too held with the pastries but I know you have to get ready," she says, giving me a smile. I smile back, nodding before I disappear up the steps.

Sae always lets me help her with the desserts whenever we are having a dinner party. I've always loved baking and I'm actually pretty good at it. I've never tried making anything other than gourmet cupcakes or small wedding cakes, but Sae always tells me I can do it better than she can. My father loves when I bake, tells me he used to do it in high-school. When I was younger, we would do it together. That was until my mother told me there were more important things to focus on and scolded me every time she saw me try and sneak in to the kitchen. Now, it's just something Sae and I do in private.

"I laid your clothes out for you, Mr. Mellark!" Laviana, our maid, calls after me as I make my way down the hall. I yell back my appreciation, sure enough finding my white button-up polo lay out with a pair of khaki pants. The red tie my mother picked out is already attached.

I dress quickly, taking some time to brush my hair, make the curls lie down and not look so untamed. It's hard work but eventually I make it happen, smiling at my reflection. My phone rings from its place on the wall, the words _Glimmer _shining in my face in big bolded letters. I groan, rolling my eyes before picking it up.

"Hello?" I say.

"Peeta! I just wanted to ask what color your tie was, so we could match, of course," she tells me, the enthusiasm apparent in her voice.

"It's red," I shortly answer.

"Perfect!" And then the lines dead.

I groan in displeasure as I think of the day ahead of me. Katniss and I have barley spoken since the small argument we got in at Annie's. Many of my texts have gone unanswered and my calls ignored. This normally wouldn't have bothered me if the thought of Gale being in town wasn't looming over me as well. I wonder what they're doing now. Probably held up at Katnisses, making-out on the couch before her mother and Prim wake. I almost throw up at the thought.

"Peeta! Come downstairs and say hello!" I rush out of the room, shoving my phone into my pocket.

Haymitch Abernathy and Effie Trinket are standing in the front door of my home, the first guest like always. Effie is in a bright purple dress, her face makeup slightly to light for her skin tone and her hair fried to perfection. She smiles at me brightly as I walk down the steps, kissing me on both cheeks once I reach the bottom. Haymitch accepts a glass of champagne from the wait staff, downing the thing in one gulp before numbly taking my hand, wiping it on the seam of his black pants.

_Drunk already. _I think as he asks for another, talking to my mother about how she really outdid herself. My mother covers her heart with a thin hand, thanking him for his generosity. I smirk. This is pretty much how the rest of the day will be.

"Oh Peeta. Where is Katniss?" Effie asks, looking around. Unlike my mother, Effie has actually taken a liking to Katniss who in return, likes Effie. They always sit next to each other at dinners, enjoying the company of each other at awkward events like this.

"She's coming later," I tell her politely, shooing my mother a look. Her eyes get big, the hand covering her heart tenses. I guess informing my mother that by brining Glimmer, I would not dis-invite Katniss, would have been a good idea but hey; what are you gonna do?

Just then the doorbell rings.

"Oh Peeta!" I cringe at the sound of the voice. Glimmer Jennings has arrived ladies and gentleman and oh boy, did she arrive.

Glimmer is dressed in a fitting red dress that ruffles at the top, stopping just above her knees. She has grown an extra five inches from the red platforms she is wearing which cannot be comfortable. Her blonde hair is all down, framing her face in a flattering way. The makeup that's painted on her face is heavy, a look I do not necessarily care for. "Hello, Mrs. Mellark," she greets, leaving red lipstick on my mother's cheek. She kisses me on the cheek too, winking as she pulls away.

"Guests are arriving, Mrs. Mellark," Sae announces from the kitchen.

"Shall we move this party outside," my mother asks, shifting around Haymitch and out of the door. Glimmer wraps one hand around my arm, pulling me along as we move out of the door to many awaiting eyes that are feasting on small pastries and drinking orange juice laced with vodka. I try to grab one from a passing waiter but Glimmer slaps my hand away.

"You don't want to drink at something like this," she tells me, narrowing her eyes at me as if I'm a dumb naïve child.

"Actually, I do," I say back, grabbing the next one I see and downing it. She rolls her eyes, fixing the look on her face as we travel across the ground together, saying hello to couples who speak to us. Out of the corner of my eye, I spot Annie with her parents. My eyes wonder for Finnick who has not yet made his appearance. "Annie!" I call, waving her over.

Her eyes are thankful as she comes closer to Glimmer and I. "Thank you," she mouths, grabbing a glass of red wine and sipping it. No one bats an eye as she does so. "These things blow, Mellark," She tells me, winking.

I laugh. "Tell me about it." There is a moment of awkward silence. "When is Katniss getting here?" I ask.

"She just texted me and told me Gale and her are driving up the rode not," she nods back to the gates and sure enough, the small truck Gale has pulls around and up the driveway. He removes himself from the car first, fixing the green tie he has on as he does so. He sees me watching, gives me a smirk and a wink before running to the passenger side door and opening it.

My mouth drops.

Katniss steps out from the car in a bright blue number, the back of the dress completely open. Her hair is down for once, the only makeup on her face is a light blush on her cheeks and a dark lining around her slim eyes. She places her hand in Gales, standing almost to his height in the heels she is wearing.

"Hot momma," Annie sings as they walk up, hand-in-hand.

"Thank you," Katniss laughs, throwing her arms around Annie. Annie hugs Gale next, whispering something in his ear that makes him chuckle and tell her how much he has missed her. Where is all the alcohol when you need it? "Hi, Peeta," she greets, giving me a small awkward hug, some of the tension from the past few nights still evident.

"You look lovely," I compliment, watching the way Gale is keeping a close eye on my movements.

"And you look dashing," she jokes, bumping her shoulder with mine, sending me a smile that makes my heart race.

"Gale," I say, extending my hand. We shake once, letting go and turning away from each other after.

"Well this is sufficiently awkward. Where is my Finny?" Annie says, grabbing yet another glass of wine. I know at this rate she'll be drunk by lunch but drunk Annie is a fun Annie.

"I think he just got here." Finnick walks towards us dressed in a navy button up polo and white slacks.

"Hello. Hello. Sorry I'm late. Katniss, Glimmer, beautiful as ever. Gale, how are you, man? Annie, you take my breathe away. Peeta, thank you for taming that damn hair," he jokes, pulling me into a headlock. I laugh and push him away.

"I missed you," Annie says, kissing him softly on the lips. We all smile awkwardly and look away; knowing affectionate Annie is making her appearance.

"It is too early in the day for this," Glimmer mumbles. Katniss shoots her a dirty look, whispering something to Gale which causes him to give her a dirty look.

"There in love. Is that problem?" Katniss remarks, moving around Gale who has pulled her into a tight hug.

"No, but what is a problem is the amount of alcohol that girl has a tendency to consume on a daily basis," Glimmer snaps back, narrowing her eyes at Katniss. Great. Here we go.

I move around Glimmer and push her slightly to my side, prepared for Katnisses famous, unexpected swings. I hope for today, it doesn't come. I love Katniss to death—for all the flaws—but today I just need her to be on her best behavior.

"Control your girl, Mellark," Gale says, his grey eyes locking with mine.

"We're not all good at _that_, now are we, Hawthorne?" Gales bottom lip trembles with anger. Katniss puts a hand on his chest and pushes him back softly, making him focus back on her. She shakes her head no and he seems to listen, taking a deep breath for sending me a strained smile.

"I'm going to say hello to Cato," he tells Katniss, kissing her on the cheek before turning around and walking away.

Cato Admins is talking to Marvel Smith, the quarterback at Trinity. I watch as Gale saunters over and they both embrace him in a tight hug, ruffling his hair and making jokes.

"I'll go say hello to Clove," Glimmer whispers, dropping my arm and stepping around Katniss, moving to the opposite side of the grounds.

When I look back down at Katniss, her eyes are dark and angry.

"You were way outta line, Peeta," she tells me, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Well," I answer with a shrug.

"I knew we shouldn't have come," she says, mostly to herself.

"_He _shouldn't have come," I correct, nodding over to Gale who is now sipping straight vodka.

"Well _he _is with me like _you _are with her," she nods over to Glimmer who is watching the scene closely. "So, no. You get both of us or none of us."

I feel as if I've just been slapped. My face must show it because Katnisses features soften and her eyes fall to the ground, a thing she does when she feels guilty. "Look, just… Lay off. Please." She turns around then and walks away, back to Gale.

And I guess that's how things these days always end; her going back to Gale.

I grab another glass of orange juice and vodka, trying to escape my sober state.

Today was going to be a long, long day.

* * *

**Good? Bad? Inbetween?**

**LET ME KNOW!**

**The rest of the brunch is coming up! Please leave me some feedback. I'd love to hear what you guys think. **

**The song at the beginning is "Super Rich Kids" by: Frank Ocean. One of my favorite songs at the moment! Definatley one of the songs on my story playlist. **

**Thanks!**

**-B**


	5. Chapter 5

"_**The phases always stay the same,  
so I face the fact that I'm just fine,  
the fact that I'm just fine."**_

Chapter 5

"Let's just leave," Gale interjects, mid thought, grabbing a muffin from a passing tray and shoving it in to his mouth, crumbs falling onto the nice, ironed shirt he has on. I laugh, using my right hand to brush the remains on to the fluffy green grass at our feet. "Oops," he mumbles, laughing along with me, wiping his mouth with the hand that isn't holding on to the half-eaten muffin.

"We can't, Gale. We just got here," I tell him.

"So?" He asks with his mouth full. I roll my eyes, shaking my head at how immature he can be sometimes.

My eyes fall on Clove who has on the tightest green dress I have ever seen. Her heels make her at least six foot, almost Rhys height who has a strong arm around her thing waist and is whispering sweet nothings into her ear. She laughs, slapping his chest before lifting her head and placing a soft kiss on his lips which seem to be covered in sugar from all the pastries. Clove eyes find mine and she waves, sending me a small smile, exposing the little bit of egg she has in the corner of one of her teeth. I choke out a laugh, waving back and playing it off as if Gale has just told me something funny.

"Do you want to smoke?" Gale whispers in to my ear, one arm tightening around my waist while the other plays with the end of my hair. I can feel the smile in his voice at the request and I feel my own lips turning up as he makes the request. I shake his arms away from me, turning around to fall properly into the mold of his body. "Is this a yes?" He asks, leaning down to place his lips on mine before pulling away a little too quickly. He lips taste of Vodka.

"Not here." He sticks out his lip, raising his eyebrows once more in questioning. "No," I repeat with more authority this time, pushing his chest slightly. It's his turn to return my dramatic eye roll.

"When can we leave?" He asks, whiny Gale coming out.

"Around one or two. Lord have mercy." Gale checks the gold watch on his right hand, rolling his eyes and whispering something about how pointless this is but I'm not paying attention to him.

I watch from a far as Glimmer reaches up, her heels making her just as tall as Peeta, and whispers in his ear, her red lip-stick leaving marks as they move across the span of skin. I feel my face produce a scowl as Peeta smirks, shaking his head no to whatever her request was. She smirks back, his denial obviously not making her second guess her place here with him.

Peeta is obviously not interested in her. His eyes are wondering over the grounds and he even makes a point to chew on the nail of his index finger, a sheer indication he has no interest in her. Her sexual motives must be failing because Peeta looks more interested in the clear alcohol floating in his plastic champagne glass then the way her boobs are already halfway out of her dress. Nausea sneaks up on me and I can no longer watch without the fear of throwing up the one piece of sugar bread I had.

Annie and Finnick have already disappeared, probably in the orchards in the northern part of the grounds, making out behind a big tree. No one will be back there, at least not today. I smile, trying to remember when the love Gale and I had been young and new, exciting.

What happened to the love Gale and I had? Well, the love that Gale had for me. I couldn't call what I felt for him love. Not in the way he would want me to mean it. I loved him in a way that I wanted to see him happy, that I would hate to see him hurt. In a way a loved being in his company, in his shadow even, at some times. But I loved Peeta that way, also. So whether or not it counted as "love"—the kind of love you have for your significant other—I couldn't decide.

"What do you wanna do? After this," he asks, looking bored out of his mind. His grey eyes reflect off of the light, turning somewhat green in a way that reminds me of Annie and Finnicks. I bring a soft hand up to touch his face, watching as his eyes close and he melts in to my embrace with nothing but pure love. After a moment, I move back, putting a nice distance between us. His eyes open again and I can see there questioning. I don't ask about it though. I have a feeling whatever he wants to ask, I'm not interested in answering.

This will have to end soon. Surely, he won't be willing to wait for me to be committed for much longer. I know that. And if he doesn't want to be the one to end it, I may have to do the honor. I can just see it now, sitting in the bed of his truck, a good three feet apart, not saying a word. I'll start out by letting him know it's me, not him. A cliché move that never fails.

Oh, what a wonderful day that will be.

I feel a pair of eyes on me and turn my head to meet a pair of bright blue one which are filled with hurt and jealousy for reasons I can't quite understand. Peeta and I have never had a real relationship, not one that involved any feeling other than friendship. But now, it was starting to feel like we did. Like we were constantly hurting each other with actions that we shouldn't pay any mind too.

"Three o'clock," Gale whispers in my ear, pulling me tightly into his side, his left hand sinking into my hip. I hiss in pain and he loosens his grip, nodding his head back.

Mrs. Mellark is striding across the grounds, a glass of champagne in her perfectly manicured hand. She strides in her cream colored dress, her feet falling into step with Mr. Mellark whose cream polo matches perfectly with hers. She seems to be telling him something that makes his friendly face turn dark. Probably something about me.

"Katniss, dear, how are you," Mr. Mellark greets as they pause next to Gale and I, embracing me in a tight hug. He claps Gale on the back, making friendly conversation about how college life is treating him while Mrs. Mellarks eyes travel over my body, examining my attire for the day which probably is in no way up to her standards.

"This is beautiful Mrs. Mellark," I compliment, noting how the silence is becoming tense and unwelcoming. Gales grip on my hip tightens a small amount then loosens.

"Thank you," she grits threw her teeth, her smile tight and unfriendly. I produce a smile too which is probably giving off the same message that hers his. I begin to question why I'm here. "Where did you get the dress?" She asks. I look down at the blue dress I'm wearing, a hand me down of my mothers. I tell her so. Her eyes turn a tad bit darker; the red on her cheeks is no longer artificial. "I see."

"It's very beautiful, Katniss. You look just like your mother, minus the mop of blonde hair," Mr. Mellark jokes, ruffling my brunette curls. I laugh along with him, thankful for the lightness that is now in the air. Mr. Mellark pats my back, his eyes searching for something. "Where is my boy?" He asks. "Ah! Peeta! Glimmer!"

"Mr. Mellark, it's okay," I tell him, not really wanting to be faced with Peeta and Glimmer again.

"Yes, Peter. There is no need," Mrs. Mellark agrees, looking like it's taking all her will to do so. Mr. Mellark brushes us off, continuing his motioning for Peeta who is now stumbling across the grounds with Glimmer on his arm who looks as if someone had just thrown up all over the Gucci heels she has on.

When Peeta arrives, the smell of alcohol is heavy in the air.

"Dad," Peeta says, shaking hands with his father. It never fails to make me wonder why Peeta feels the need to always be so formal with his father. I don't question it though. That is just the way things are here in the Mellark home. They all act as if their associates, let alone family.

"You and Glimmer didn't look like you guys were enjoying yourself to much," he comments, smiling at Glimmer who is still glued to Peetas side but is eyeing me suspiciously, glancing me over more than once.

"That's not it. It's just hot," Glimmer assures, smiling brightly at Mr. Mellark who looks unphased by the obvious lie. Truthfully, no one enjoys these things but whoever is hosting it.

"Well you four can all be hot together! Peeta, why don't you tell Gale how much you want to go to Pepperdine!" Gales face contorts and Peeta coughs.

"No. I don't wanna go that badly," he mumbles quietly, training his eyes on the green grass.

Just as Mr. Mellark is about to respond, Mrs. Mellark grasp his hand, pulling him away and towards the Crestas who are at the bar, drinking softly on wine. Mr. Mellark bids us all farewell and Mrs. Mellark says goodbye to Glimmer who smiles enthusiastically. I roll my eyes.

"I know she hates you, but what did I do?" Gale jokes, wrapping his arms around my waist. I laugh and nudge at his side. Peeta coughs, turning our attention back to him.

"Would you two mind saving that stuff for later? Like, when you're alone."

"I think we're good now, but thanks," Gale remarks sarcastically.

Peeta opens his mouth to respond when Annie saunters up, Finnick at her side. Her red hair is no longer in the cute bun she had earlier but in long, cascading waves down her back. Her red lipstick, barley a light shade of pink now. I smirk, looking over at Finnick whose button down shirt is untucked, his hair looking unkempt.

"Glad to know someone is having fun," Glimmer remarks, sipping on a bottle of water.

"Got that right," Annie taunts, placing her head on Glimmers exposed shoulder. Glimmer groans.

"And of course, you're drunk," she mutters under her breathe.

"Two points for you!" Annie jokes, making all of us giggle at the shade of red Glimmer turns. "Party on the beach tonight. You all in?"

Party at Annie's usually end with the cops being called, a few kids arrested, one or two fights, the whole junior class having sex behind the pillars and a massive hangover in the morning. All the good aspects of partying.

"Sounds fun," I say, looking to Gale who is smiling down at me, nodding.

"I'm in," Finnick says, pecking Annie on the forehead.

"Why not," Peeta growls.

We all turn to Glimmer. "I'll see if I can make it," she says.

That's a yes.

"Let's go," I whisper to Gale. He nods, saying goodbye to everyone.

"I'll go get the car," he tells me, kissing me on the cheek before running to the valet, ticket in hand.

"Bye doll," Annie kisses me goodbye, reminding me I have no choice but to attend tonight before Finnick kisses me softly on the cheek, reminding me also.

Then there were three.

"So will I see the two of you tonight?" I ask, trying my best to not make the silence too awkward.

"Yes, I guess you will," Glimmer answers, her smile growing.

"Cool." I say simply, bidding goodbye to the two of them.

I'm halfway off the front lawn when I hear someone softly calling my name. Peeta is jogging towards me, his eyes serious and determined.

"Hm?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. When I turn fully, I smack into his chest with such force I almost fall back. He places a hand on the small of my back and holds me up. I lift my head to think him and just as I do so, he lowers his mouth down on to mine.

The kiss is slow and careful and nothing like Gales. His lips are soft and easy, the taste of his spearmint gum on his lips. After a moment, I melt into the kiss, closing my eyes, escaping my senses and just letting myself sink into the feeling. His lips mold mine, his hands roaming the small of my back.

Too soon, actuality catches up with me.

Peeta. This is Peeta…

I place my hands on his chest, pushing him back with enough force to get him a good three feet away from me. His eyes are wide when I open mine, his lips red.

"Peeta," I manage to say after a few moments of silence, touching my lips with one hand. Tears threaten to fall over the brim of my eyes for reasons I can't explain. I never cry.

"I just… I had too," he mumbles out, his eyes boring in to mine.

I turn then, kicking my heels off and sprinting towards Gales awaiting truck that has just pulled up in front of the driveway. I climb in the passenger seat, slamming the door as soon as I'm safely inside, tears falling over the edges of my eyes.

"What's wrong?" Gale asks, turning towards me, wiping away the tears with the pas of his thumb.

I don't answer though. Because I don't know to tell him.

What is wrong?

I look out of the window, watching the Mellark estate disappear from my vision.

"I don't think Peeta and I are friends anymore."

* * *

**I HATE THIS CHAPTER.**

**It's just a filler. there is so much coming up in chapter 6 but please review or there may not be a chapter 6!  
Spoilers? Want some? Okay, but only if you review.  
Annies beach party is next chapter and what will happen when Peeta and Katniss are together again?  
Who saw the kiss? When does Katniss plan on telling Gale? How will he react? What big decisions will be coming up for the two...**

**KEEP UP WITH THE STORY TO FIND OUT.**

**-b**


	6. Chapter 6

"_**I think she's gone but I'll be sure for safeties keeping.  
If you say no, then no it will be."**_

Chapter 6

The party is well underway by the time I arrive, six drunk teenagers already passed out on the couch, a few stoners sitting in the corner, enjoying all the weed they'd managed to conjure up together in a desperate attempt to get as high as they possibly can tonight. I send them a smirk as I pass, deciding being cool with them might help me in the long run. Weed is expensive. Free weed is the best kind. Everyone knows that.

I'm slightly confused as to why there are this many people here. It is no later than nine o'clock and Annie's' parties usually don't get up to this magnitude until at least 11:30 and last until well into the wee hours of the morning. I see a few guys pass, all dressed in UCLA gear, probably freshman's in college who were bored tonight and have no class to wake up for tomorrow. Word gets around about these things quickly I suppose.

I spot Finnick surrounded by Cato and Marvel who already appear to be hammered out of their minds. I shake my head. Like I said, it's only nine thirty. I walk up, grabbing an already opened beer from an awaiting table and sipping on it. I can taste the cherry chapstick on the rim and I note the red rim. Eh, whatever. Beer is beer.

"What's up, man," Cato greets, giving me a sloppy hug before running into some story about how his brother got four girls to sleep with him in the same night. Cato's brother, Will, was a sophomore in college at UCLA, a hot shot basketball player or something along those lines. He was a big deal at Trinity, a success story that we've all heard repeatedly. When he comes down for weekends, girls line up down the block to get a look at him as he lounged on the beach or ate with his family. Katniss had explained to me once that the blonde hair and piercing blue eyes made him irresistible to almost every girl in Santa Cruz.

"I don't know if you noticed or not but, I too, have blonde hair and piercing blue eyes," I told her, noting the way she turned a bright shade of red.

"That you do, but then again, I said _almost_."

Almost, my ass.

I kept replaying the moment on the lawn. Those two seconds where Katniss actually let herself feel, stop worrying so much about the consequences of things and just do whatever the hell she wanted. It was short lived but I could die a happy man now.

I don't know what made me do it. It was an impulse reaction but watching her disappear with him caused a fire to burn in my chest like no other and I knew the only way to extinguish it was to try for myself. And I must say, I'd do it again. And again. And again, if time allowed.

"PEETA!" Marvel yelled in my face, making me blink before realizing Thresh had also joined our small crowd and they all had a look of worry on their faces. "You okay?" he asks, coming up to touch his hand to my forehead.

"Yeah, yeah. Just thinking," I assure him, shaking away from his touch and going back to sipping on the beer which has warmed with the evening air.

"Is Gale coming," Cato asks after a moment of silence, his eyes trained on a short sophomore girl who is passing by in a two inch skirt and six inch red heels. I roll my eyes at the desperation.

"Yeah. He's on his yeah with Katniss now," Finnick assures, his eyes probably searching for Annie who I have no yet seen. "Anyone seen Annie?" I smirk.

"No," we all mumble in unison, taking one large sip form our beer bottles before moving out of Finnicks way as his search becomes desperate.

Finnick and Annie were one of those couples that were meant to be. One of those couples no one questioned because it just seemed so _right_. I wondered if I would ever have that. Someone who would make things seem so _right_. I felt like I had that in Katniss. I was pretty sure I did the only difference is, Gale makes Katniss feel the way I feel about her. And that makes me sick to my stomach.

"Dude, I'm worried about you," Marvel hisses in my ear, pulling hard onto the white shirt I'm wearing, his fingers leaving dirt spots where he grabbed. I growl, turning towards him.

"What?"

"Are you alright? Did something happen cause you're just out of it?" Marvel looks around anxiously, making sure no one is listening before he comes close, whispering into my ear, "Did your mom do anything? If she did you can come stay-"

"It's not my mom," I interject quickly, shaking off his worries. He seems convinced with my answer and leans away; nodding over my shoulder towards something I cannot see.

"Katniss is here." He announces, melting away into a large crowd of people.

Katniss has changed out of her brunch outfit and into a pair of jean shorts and a plain t-shirt, her hair braided to the side the way I love so much. She asses the crowd, whispering something into Gales ear who has just arrived at her side and has a strong grip on her hip, steering her in and out of people, towards the group of college kids that Gale greets with open arms. I watch from a distance as Katniss awkwardly stands there, shaking hands with each individual, introducing herself. After that, they pay no mind to the pretty girl standing amongst them.

"Hey stranger," a voice purrs into my ear, the spearmint gum their chewing almost too much.

"Glimmer," I say, turning around and wrapping my arms around her in a tight, formal hug which she returns by kissing me softly on the cheek, staining my cheek with red lipstick. She one the other hand seems to be just as dressed up. I roll my eyes. I can't escape her, can I?

"What are you doing all alone?" She asks, peering at me threw her eyelids which I think is supposed to be attractive but makes her look like she's drunk out of her mind. As far as I know, she could be.

"Not really in the party mood, ya know," I answer politely, sipping from the beer in my hand which doesn't have enough alcohol for my liking. Glimmer rolls her eyes, sipping on the red plastic glass that is probably filled with a large amount of alcohol and some kind of sugary soda.

"Peeta Mellark, not in the party mood? I never thought I would've seen the day." I laugh at her comment, not knowing what the hell she's talking about because I come to maybe ONE of these things a year.

"You drunk?" I ask.

"Yup," she says, popping the "p" and finishing her cup in one gulp, wincing as it goes down before laughing loudly, throwing her hands in the air and screaming. She attracts the attention of almost everyone around us who turns around and looks at her warily; shaking their heads before turning back to wherever there attention was averted from. I give an uncomfortable laugh and shake my head, turning my head slightly.

Katniss is staring, raising her cup softly to her own lips. I stare back, letting her know I see her, a silent game we always play. But she doesn't look away. Her eyes stay locked on mine before shifting over to Glimmer who is now attempting to get on top of a wooden piece of lawn chair.

"Down you go," I whisper to her, grabbing her by the waist and placing her on her feet, not really wanting her to embarrass herself. At least not tonight when there is no one to laugh about it with later.

"Peeta, you're so pretty," she comments bringing a hand up to touch the side of my face. I smile tightly, flinching away from her touch and making sure there is a good ten feet between us. I turn to leave, no longer able to deal with drunken Glimmer when I can barely deal with sober Glimmer.

And that's when she says it.

"It really is too bad about Katniss though, huh?" She says it loud enough to attract the attention of a few people around us, who all turn to me with curious eyes. I turn around quickly, placing one hand over Glimmers mouth while she laughs.

"Glimmer, STOP!" I tell her.

"Why? Everyone knows, Peeta. Everyone knows but you two!" She yells even louder, now attracting the attention of everyone standing within a five mile radius of us. Katnisses eyes have now grown to the size of saucers, her mouth hanging open in a silent "o".

"What are you even talking about?" I ask, trying to play off the accusations with so many eyes on my every move.

"You know what I'm talking about! Don't make me say it, Peeta," She says, ruffling my hair before turning towards Gale and Katniss who both look as confused as ever. "Better tell him yourself, Everdeen. I'm drunk and who knows what I'll say!" She bumps shoulders with Katniss as she passes and winks at Gale whose eyes are now angry.

"Tell me what?" He snarls at Katniss, taking a few steps away from her. Katniss is frozen in place, her eyes locked on mine in a silent plea for help.

"I... I don't know what she's talking about," Katniss lies, her eyes turning back to Gale.

"Oh you don't? Cause I think you do. You've been acting weird all afternoon," somewhere in the distance, the music has stopped and everyone is now focused on the scene before us.

I should say something. Anything. But I can't.

"I just… It's just…" Katniss stutters, looking at me anxiously.

Well here we go. I just gotta do it. Rip the band aid off.

"I kissed her."

There is a large inhale from the crowd and then soft mummers. In the distance I hear someone yell, "AND THAT IS FOUR HUNDRED BUCKS IN MY HAND BY MONDAY." I'm to nervous by the look Gale is giving me right now to even worry about whatever bet was built around Katniss and I.

"That true?" Gale asks Katniss who now has tears running down her cheeks, black makeup smeared around her eyes.

"Gale, I-"

"I asked if it was true!" Gale yells, causing everyone to jump in terror. Katniss nods her head, a sob escaping her. And then they both disappear threw the house.

* * *

_Katniss_

"Gale, STOP!" I plead desperately, running after him as fast as my legs will allow me. When I get close enough, he turns quickly, making me stumble back and nearly fall onto the hard road.

His face is red, a few years unshed in his eyes which break my heart. A year with this boy and it turns out, I am the one who breaks his heart in the end.

"Gale, I'm so sorry," I whisper, running a hand threw his hair which is ruffled. He doesn't flinch away from my touch but he doesn't sink into either. Rather just stands there, his eyes trained on the ground.

Suddenly, a sob breaks threw and the tears begin to fall.

"Why? Why would you do this? WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO US?" He yells and for a moment, I'm scared he might so something irrational like hit me. But he doesn't, of course. He just cries some more and then hits the stop sign on his left. "I _loved_ you."

"I know… I know," I answer, still running a hand threw his hair.

"You must not if you would do something like that to me," he spits back, hitting my hand away and turning his back towards me where he travels back down the road. I fall into step with him this time, trying desperately to grab a free hand.

"I'm so sorry," I apologize again, not knowing what more to say.

"I always knew something would happen with the two of you. It was fucking inevitable," he gives a humorless laugh, not slowing his strides.

"Nothing is happen," I tell him.

"Apparently something did!"

"Gale!"

"WHAT, KATNISS?! If anyone gets to be fucking irritated right now, ITS ME! I get to be pissed off and you get to shut the FUCK up!"

"I'M SORRY!" I sob, sinking down to my knees on the side of the road and crying into my hands.

"You broke my heart, Katniss." And then he's gone.

I sit in silence for a long time before I hear footsteps again and before I even look up to see who it is, I swing. My fist is caught midair, the scent of Pink No. 1 filling my nostrils.

"Bad day?" Annie asks, sitting next to me on the curb, lighting a cigarette.

"You could say that," I answer after a long while, reaching into the pack and grabbing one myself.

"Where'd Gale go?"

"That way," I pointed down the street, towards the direction he ran. She nods.

"Did Peeta really kiss you?"

"Yeah."

"I'm proud. Boy finally found his balls."

"Is it true?"

"Is what true?"

"What Glimmer said? About how everyone knew but us?"

"Pretty much, doll."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Because you had to see it for yourself." There's a long pause before anyone speaks again. "We don't pick who we love, Katniss. It just happens. Like Finnick and I. It just happened. And you and Peeta were meant to happen, but no one could make it happen. You two had to be stupid enough to figure it out on your own before we pushed you into anything." She exhales smoke onto my face and I do the same to her.

"Love should be a sin," I tell her.

She laughs. "It is. Love is the most painful thing on this goddamned planet." She waits awhile before she adds, "but it saves us."

"Loves a losing game, my friend."

"That it is. May the odds be ever in your favor, Katniss Everdeen."

* * *

**_Good? Bad? In-between?_**

**_PLEASE LEAVE ME FEEDBACK. _**

**_The song in the beginning is "Colly Strings" by Manchestar Orchestra._**

**_Really great band at the moment!  
PLEASE REVIEWS!_**


	7. Chapter 7

"_**For you I was a flame,  
Love is a losing game."**_

Chapter 7

"We do have to go back at some point," Annie points out to me after she finishes her second cigarette and has promptly disposed of it in the street. The last remains of sparks are turning black like the tar on the street before disappearing all together.

We've been stationed here for what feels like at least an hour, not saying anything, just smoking. I try not to smoke, more for Prims benefit than mine but now I remember why I like it so much. The crying has stopped, at least the hysterical crying. My eyes have now grown twice their size, turned a shade of red and the black eye liner I was wearing is running down my cheeks, putting me in very bad shape.

"I can't go anywhere like this," I tell Annie, assessing myself in the window of a car, wincing.

"Got that right," Annie answers, pulling out a baby wipe and wiping down my cheeks for me, all evidence of crying erased from my features except or the puffiness of my face. I can live with that though.

Annie takes a tight hold on my hand and pulls me along, walking at my side, lacing her fingers threw mine as we walk, not saying anything.

Annie and I became best friends shortly after my dad died. She was the only one in my classes who didn't have a look of sympathy every time I passed or have her parents buy me an escort to and from school, make sure I had the nicest clothes money could buy or ate five-star meals every night for a month. She didn't treat me any differently.

In fact, she didn't acknowledge my father had died at all. She never had.

"Why didn't you ask if I was okay," I ask once her home comes back into view. I can see the drama put no damper in the party whatsoever. The music is still blasting, more and more teenagers filling in as it gets later. The college boys have arrived with their cheerleader girlfriends on their arms, sniffing for beer that they know is here.

"I hate that question."

"What question?" I ask.

"_Are you okay?"_ She answers, pulling me to the other side of the street. "If someone feels the need to comfort you, obviously you are _not_ okay. So it's stupid. It's pointless. I know you're not okay _now_ but you will be. Because that's what humans do. We get okay."

"You're something else, Annie," I tell her, smiling a little bit.

"You see," she says, digging her pointer finger into my dimple. "You're already getting okay."

My laugh abruptly ends when the house comes into full view and so do I. Delly Cartwright who is sitting on the lap of Samson Jones locks eyes with mine and leans over to whisper into Samson's ear which causes him to also, turn his attention away from the cleavage she's managing to show and towards me. I look towards Annie who also has her eyes on Delly as we pass. "I can't," I whisper to her, suddenly self-conscious of all the eyes that will be on me when I walk into that room.

I can just see it now. It will be like the day I returned home after my father's dead but worse. Ten times worse because death sucks and brings attention, but cheating on your boyfriend with your best friend raises all kinds of hell. That I know.

Annie rolls her eyes. "Fuck her!" She yells loud enough for anyone within a ten feet radius to hear. Dellys eyes narrow and she pulls Samson to his feet, pulling him away and towards the back on the house where the couples are all seated. A few juniors who managed to get wind of this party turn their attention towards us and laugh, obviously drunk off their asses.

I get a few mild looks from girls as I pass, a few scowls from Gale's friends who obviously find no reason to go comfort him when there is free booze around. Annie gives them the finger as we pass, telling them all to fuck themselves and get out of a high school party. I understand, fully, why she is my best friend. They don't leave though. I didn't think they would.

"Finny," Annie sings, pulling Finnicks shoulder to spin him around. Annie says goodbye to whoever he is talking to who scowls before picking up a beer and sauntering off, starting a conversation with a sophomore girl who has managed to lose her top.

Finnick plants a kiss on her lips and smiles, whispering something in to her ear that makes her burst into giggles. I roll my eyes. Finnicks attention turns to me and he gives me a soft smile, one full of embarrassment and sympathy. "Katniss, looking beautiful as always," he compliments, kissing my hand. I thank him, suddenly feeling uncomfortable for still being here.

"Annie, I think I should go," I tell her, digging in my pocket for my car keys which I seemed to misplace.

Oh wait. I didn't drive. Fuck.

"How are you getting home?" She yells over the music, looking concerned. I shrug my shoulders, wondering who in the world I could call that would actually be in the state to drive me home. All of my friends were here and they were all drunk out of their minds.

"I'll take you," a voice says from behind me, lifting a comforting hand to the small of my back and placing it there. My nostrils fill with the smell of saltwater and Guess cologne. I know of only one person who could afford such a scent.

"No, its fine," I tell Peeta who looks just of a mess as I do. His hair is disheveled and drenched with sweat so that it is falling down in his eyes.

"Let him take you, Katniss," Finnick yells, winking at Peeta who I'm sure is wearing a stupid grin on that handsome face of his. I give Finnick a look of pure disgust while he laughs, flicking my chin before turning back to Annie who is smiling brightly at me.

"Fine," I hiss, not waiting for Peeta to say anything before I turn towards the door and start the journey of fighting threw drunken civilians to make it out of the front door without any injuries. I get a few elbows to the head and some beer on my left shoe but I make it, the hot air outside actually welcoming.

Peeta is at my side at once and I can almost feel the tension between us. He stands a good three feet away, his hands in his pockets as we move down the street to his Jeep which I can see in the distance.

I don't know when Peeta started feeling _this_ way and maybe I should have known. We were best friends after all. I knew how he was feeling just by the color shirt he wore. Why didn't I know he felt this way? Would it have changed anything? Maybe it would've. Maybe it would've strained our relationship even more than it had been lately or maybe it would've brought us back together.

My thoughts are interrupted when Peeta coughs loudly and I realized I have passed the jeep and kept walking. "I get it you don't wanna go with me, but that's going to be a pretty long walk," he tells me, the lightness in his voice from earlier gone. I turn on my heel with no response and jump into the passenger side, turning my body away from him as he gets in after me and begins to drive, turning the radio to the alternative station he likes.

We don't talk for a long time. Not until were passing over the bridge and nearing his house which is nearly fifteen minutes from Annie's private beach. He breaks the silence.

"Are you mad at me for kissing you or telling Gale?"

Good question.

"Both," I say quietly, contemplating whether or not I should've answered at all. Some things are better left unsaid.

"Both?" He questions, his eyes darting over to me in the passenger seat.

"Yeah, both." I tell him, not wanting to discuss it any further.

"Why?"

"_Why?" _I ask the annoyance perfectly clear in my voice. "If you hadn't kissed me, there would have been nothing to tell Gale, Peeta. That's the point!"

"You've never wondered about it though, Katniss? You've never thought, what would life be like if Peeta and I ended up together?"

This question makes me realize he has. It makes me realize he probably sits in his room late at night, after we've hung out and thinks about the couple we could be. I'd be lying if I said I never thought about. I've wondered what it would be like to be with someone who is so in sync with you, so alike.

"No," I lie. Like I said, some things are better left unsaid.

The hurt on his face in undeniable and suddenly, I feel sick to my stomach knowing I've upset him. It contorts for a second before falling back, his features smoothing back out but without the lightness he had earlier. Now he seemed closed off. "We'll sorry," he whispers, turning the radio up, an obvious sign he no longer wants any part in conversation with me.

The rest of the car ride is tense complete with awkward tense glances at one another, and long sighs that insinuate unanswered questions.

My house is pulling up into view; all the lights are shut off telling me everyone is asleep. Peeta parks in his usual spot, turning off the engine and leaning back against the seat of his jeep, staring at the steering wheel as I unbuckle myself from the contraption. I don't plan on saying anything else. I plan on getting out of this car, marching upstairs; throwing my iPhone against a wall and sleeping off all the hurt and devastation of tonight but its obvious Peeta has other plans.

As I open the door to leave, a cold hand wraps around my wrist and pulls my back inside, closing the door with the hand that isn't holding me in place. He doesn't say anything. His eyes just plead. They stare into mine with such intensity I can't even remember where I am or why I'm here. "I want you to say something," he whispers, barely audible.

"You know I'm not good at that," I respond quietly after a moment.

"When I found out you and Gale were together, I was just so mad. I didn't know what to do," he starts, shaking his head from side to side. I want to stop him, tell him not to say whatever he's about to say but suddenly I'm interested. I want to know. "For the longest time I didn't know why I was mad. Never had a problem with the guy and he was always nice whenever I'd see him but the fact you were with him just bugged the shit out of me. I would see the two of you together and I didn't know how to feel. I was mad, then I was hurt, then I was confused, all for reasons I didn't understand." He pauses and examines my face, satisfied with whatever he saw to continue his rant. "And then today, watching you leave with him, something just snapped within me and I couldn't… I'd let you leave with him so many times but I couldn't this time. I had to have you know that you were leaving with him, and I was leaving with you. That it was you and me that belonged together. That we should happen. And maybe I went about it wrong but… I don't regret it. I'd do it again."

I should say something. I should tell him I understand. I should tell him how I feel like he told me but suddenly, I couldn't talk. I couldn't say anything but just stare back.

"Now, I _need_ you to say something."

I find the right words.

"Why now?"

"What do you mean?" His eyebrows jumble together and the vein above his head protrudes the way he does when he really is confused.

"Why _now_? Why are you telling me all of this _now_?" He opens his mouth to say something then closes again, not finding the right words. "Are you scared you're going to lose me?"

He doesn't do anything for a while and then he turns his body away from my own and focuses his attention back on the steering wheel.

"Looks like I already did, Katniss."

Ouch.

"What the hell does that mean?" I ask, getting defensive.

"I lay my fucking heart out on the table and that's all I get? I get accused of losing you? Give me fucking break, Katniss. You aren't that fucking special." He reaches over me and opens the door. When I don't move, he looks over at me and shrugs his eyes dark. "Get the hell out of my car."

I recoil as if I've physically been slapped but I might as well have. Peeta has never been this cruel to me. No one ever has been. My eyes fill with tears and I remove myself from the car before I can do something stupid like cry in front of him.

He doesn't waste any time speeding away, leaving me on the front step of my home with tears running down my face.

When safely in my room, I cry. For a long time.

A hear a soft knock on my door. "Katniss," Prim whispers, coming inside the dark room with what looks like water in her small hand. She sits on the edge of my bed and brushes the dark hair from my face, making me sit up to drink as I begin to hiccup. "Please stop crying," she asks me, her face soft and mature.

"Go to sleep, Prim," I tell her, not wanting her to see my like this.

"I just want to make sure you're okay."

"I'm fine," I tell her.

"I won't ask what happened," she tells me.

"Better not," I laugh, wiping my face.

"Your phone has been ringing for the past three hours nonstop," she informs me, handing me the device. I have three missed calls from Thresh, Marvel and Finnick. Six texts from various numbers. None from Peeta or Gale.

"Go to sleep, little duck," I tell her once I've calmed down, shooing her from the room. She leaves without a fight and I can see her eyes closing as she wobbles to the door. She leaves without saying goodnight.

I put my phone on the bedside table and close my eyes, finally believing I may be able to get sleep. Just when I'm falling, my phone buzzes, my heart leaping, hoping for Peeta.

But it's Annie.

_We're humans and we get okay. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow but it happens. You'll get okay. Love you. Goodnight. _

"You'll get okay, Katniss," I whisper to myself before falling into oblivion.

* * *

**HOPE YOU WERE SATISFIED!  
I don't want anyone to hate Peeta for his reaction to Katniss but we've all had the feeling when he put ourselves out there and we get shut down! It's never a good feeling and we sometimes react negivatley on that! **

**On the contray, I would like as much feedback as possible. Tell me if you like it, if you hate it, if you LOVE it? :)**

**Tell me what you want to happen or what you dont want! this story is based completely off of whatever you guys are wanting to read!**

**The song in the beginning of the story is Love Is A Losing Game by the late and great Amy Winehouse!  
REVIEW!**

**-B**


	8. Chapter 8

"_**So there my friend, you're in the deep end.  
Just hanging on, to hope by a lose thread."**_

Chapter 8

By the time I'm home, all the anger has subsided and all that's left is the pain and hurt of Katnisses rejection. I don't know when I started crying but I'm guessing it was the moment I pulled away from Katnisses street. At first, they were angry tears. Angry tears that were directed towards her for just being so selfish.

She had always been this way. With everyone except Prim but only because to her, the sun set and rose on Prim. I couldn't blame her. She had the same effect on me as well. Ever since we were kids she had only been concerned about number one. I couldn't blame her. Most people in Santa Cruz were like that. Hell, _I_ was like that. That is until I met Katniss. Then I became a background noise to her show, but I didn't mind. That was the way I liked it.

I don't know why it bothered me so much now. I had grown up with it and I couldn't expect anything different. For once I wanted her to be selfless. I wanted to be number one, even just for a moment.

After a while, the angry tears at her turned into angry tears towards me. I was mad at myself. I had never spoken to anyone that way and I sure as hell had never spoken to Katniss that way. I can't shake the look of pure hurt that crossed her features before I drove away. I wanted to go back, to turn around and tell her I was sorry. I contemplated getting back in my jeep and speeding back to her house, climbing threw her window and pouring my heart out, apologizing for my juvenile actions but it was late. She would be fast asleep with no worries about what an asshole her best friend is.

I jam my key into the lock, shoving my way into the door with my shoulder. All the lights are out except for the one in the kitchen, my indication that Sae is probably still here cleaning up from this morning. I wonder over to the open doorway, knocking Sae who is wiping down the counters with a wet paper towel. She turns when she hears me comes in and gives me a friendly, toothless smile. "Peeta, boy, where have you been?" She asks, holding her arm out to me. I fall into her embrace and smile at the scent of vanilla that fills my nostrils. "I saved you your favorite," she tells me, moving over to the fridge and grabbing me one chocolate cupcake. I smile.

"Thanks, Sae." I eat half of it in one bite, amazed at how extraordinary these cupcakes are. "It's delicious," I say, my voice cracking slightly due to the dryness in my throat.

"I know, boy. Now slow down," she scolds, getting me a glass of milk and placing it before me. She motions for me to sit at the island and joins me shortly, grabbing one for herself. "Where have you been?"

"I went to a party at Annies," I inform her.

She raises an eyebrow. "And you drove home?"

I smirk. "I didn't drink." That isn't one hundred percent the truth but I better spare her.

"Did you smoke?"

"No," I laugh. I've never once in my life smoked. It was never my thing.

"Then why are your eyes red?" She raises an eyebrow in accusation. Shit. I forgot.

I don't answer; instead I eat the rest of my cupcake and swallow whatever is left of my glass of milk. Sae doesn't push, she just holds my gaze for a while before going back to her own cupcake and eating it slowly.

"You must really love any girl you cry over," she whispers.

Sae always knew everything. You never had to tell her a thing.

"I do," I whisper back, looking up into her grey eyes. They remind me so much of Katniss it hurts. I have to look away quickly and instead focus on the patterns on the counter. I trace them with my pinky finger, curling when needed, dotting when necessary.

"So what happened then?"

"I just… I really don't even know what happened," I laugh a humorless laugh. "I don't know what we're fighting over," I confess, putting my head in my hands, running a hand threw my hair before exhaling deeply.

"Then why fight?" She questions.

"I don't know. It's complicated."

"What's so complicated about it?"

"Everything."

She doesn't say anything for a while. "Katniss has always been complicated, Peeta. You knew that."

"How do you know who I'm talking about," I question.

"When have you ever needed to tell me anything?" She jokes, smiling.

"Good point," I reply, laying my head on the kitchen counter.

Everyone must've known about Katniss and me then. Obviously everyone but the two of us. I couldn't even begin to describe how many words of encouragement I'd gotten. One freshman I don't even know the name of patted me on the back, congratulating me on finally finding my balls. I was tempted to spit in his face but decide that wouldn't get me anywhere.

"What do you like about her if she's so complicated?" Sae asks, cleaning up the mess we've made.

I shrug. Id asked myself this question multiple times. "She's just worth it."

Sae doesn't say anymore. She just moves in silence as she finishes up the house. I watch as she puts away the left over cupcakes and puts the frozen milk back into the fridge. She moves slowly, her age really showing now.

"She'll come around, Peeta. Just wait for tomorrow." She shuts off the lights then, leaving me in darkness and in the distance I can hear the door closing and locking behind her.

I dig my phone out of the pockets of my jeans, placing it on the counter and bringing it to life. It vibrates almost instantly, a millions texts from Finnick begging me to call him back. There is one text from Thresh simply saying, _"call."_

I dial Finnicks number and only have to wait two rings before Finnick answers. "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" Finnick has always been one to worry almost to the point where its scary. There have been numerous times when we've been forced to drive by Annies house when she refuses to answer the phone. Almost always she has just fallen asleep and forgot to tell Finnick.

"I was driving, dick hole. Give me a break," I snarl into the phone, running a hand threw my hair.

"How was I supposed to know that? I let you drive home and you had drank and I'm a terrible-"

"Shut up." I interrupt. He stops talking immediately and takes a deep breathe. "I only had one beer. I've driven on worse."

I move out of the kitchen and up the stairs, being careful to avoid the fourth step because when Katniss and I were in eighth grade we slid down the stairs and ended up unhinging that one, meaning it now clicks every time anyone steps on the thing. Just another memory that pains me.

I remember that day as if it was yesterday. Katniss and I were hanging out at my house, my parents both at a conference and Liam and Rhy had promised they wouldn't say anything as long as I gave them my allowance for a month. I had no problem making this trade and was delighted when Katniss arrived at my front door that day, in a light pink shirt and a pair of shorts, a book in her hand.

I gave her a tour of the house even though she had been here for my birthday party that February. She still was a good sport and asked all the right questions at all the right times and when we ended the tour, she complimented me on how "lovely my home was".

"You sound like one of my mothers friends," I told her.

"It's the polite thing to say," she let me know.

"It isn't sincere." She shrugged and told me it didn't matter and I knew I had a beautiful home. "I like yours better."

The day went by normally and we soon grew bored hanging out by the pool and decided to go up to my room. At the time, I thought nothing of this. Katniss was a whole head taller than I was and I only looked at her as a friend. It wasn't that I didn't like girls—just not Katniss.

We were walking up the stairs, her long braid swaying down her back. I reached up with a hand and yanked on it hard, making her head jerk back. I laughed at the small scream that escaped her throat but it was cut short when her fist made contact with my jaw. It was my turn to scream.

"What are you doing," I yelled, watching her as she fumed above me.

"What are YOU doing," she counter played, straightening out her braid which was now coming undone. "You don't pull girls hair."

"You can't just punch people!"

"Self-defense!" She yelled back, shoving my slightly. I shoved her back and so forth and so forth until I pushed her a little too hard, causing her to fall backwards. She screamed, grabbing onto the railing before falling on the step hard, a satisfying crunch filling the room.

Liam and Rhy ran out of their rooms then, laughing hysterically as Katniss stood up and where her body used to be was a pile of wood.

After letting Liam and Rhy laugh for a good hour, they finally agreed to help us and replaced the broken wood with a board which was loosely screwed on and now made a terrible creek every time anyone stepped on it. We all knew to avoid it by now though. Every time Katniss came over, she would jump over the step, yank on her braid and yell "SELF DEFENSE" no matter what. It always made me laugh but now thinking about it I was nervous I might burst into tears.

I'm reminded I'm on the phone with Finnick by his shrill voice yelling in my ear. "DID YOU HEAR ME," he asks.

"No," I answer honestly, turning on the top light in my room and lying in my bed, not bothering to undress.

"I asked if you wanted me to come over." Instead of answering, I hang up the phone and throw it against the wall. For a moment I'm worried I may have cracked it but then I decide I promptly don't give a fuck.

My mind is swarming with thoughts and images of Katniss, not giving me any chance of falling asleep. I think about calling her, apologizing for what I said to her and how I kicked her out of my car. The stubborn part of me tells me she deserves it. But if anyone knows Katniss, I do.

She didn't mean to offend me. She just doesn't know how to put her feelings into words and tonight I punished her for that.

I groan as I roll out of bed, reaching for my iPhone which I'm surprised to find uncracked. I know Katnisses number by heart and have no problem dialing it. I hesitate for a moment before pressing the call button but do it in a moment of confidence, sitting on the edge of my bed as it rings.

I wait the whole thirty seconds before her voicemail greets me. "Hey, this is Katniss! Sorry I'm not able to take your call right now. I promise I will return it as soon as possible! Thanks!"

I take a deep breathe, waiting for the beep before I can leave my message.

_BEEP. _

"Hey Katniss, it's Peeta. Well yeah you have caller ID so I'm sure you know that but… I just want to tell you I'm sorry for earlier. I…I was bring a dick and—yeah well sorry is all I can think about saying right now so, call me back please. I hope I didn't ruin your life—shit why did I say that? Um, okay well. Yeah. Call me."

I almost think of adding I love you but decide against it because I know she doesn't feel the same.

* * *

**I'm so sorry this took so long to get done, school has just been really busy and i havent had a lot of free time! Anyway, i hope you like this chapter. Its not one of my favorites but i felt it did it's job. Anyway, please review! Thank you!**

**This one is for "emmanmo235" who was begging for a review. HERE YOU GO DOLL!**

**Thanks.**


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